Native Day

Today is my birthday. I am 52, the same age as my father when he died. I really don't think overly much about the fact that the men in my father's side of the family do not tend to cash their retirement checks. But neither can I say that I dwell on it either. Indeed, some people have expressed mild surprise that I have managed to live this long. But they weren't making a comment about my genetic background as much as they were about my dyspeptic nature and historic nose for trouble.

As my brother the nurse said last night, " Rollo (my cardiologist) and I were talking about you the last day I worked at the clinic. We figure the odds of you having a heart attack are a lot less than the odds of you getting shot. But there ain't nothing we can do about that other problem." And actually, my odds on that latter score are getting better since a) the invention of Caller ID and b) my inability to stay up much past, say, 10:15.

It has been a good birthday. A highly respected educator and leader of young men here in the LR area showed up last night bearing a six pack of what turns out is his favorite beer. So I can expect a visit soon. Which is fine. Had dinner with KM and PM last night. Will be going out the next two nights and Saturday the family will be over for burgers on the grill. I told my excellent friend Renee the hectoring scold from Tucson that I would be a fat drunk before this was all over.

"That's OK," she said. "You were a skinny drunk up until now." All of these comedians out of work and listen to her.

This, by the way, is but one example of the torrent of abuse I have been receiving all day. Even my deaf friend got into the act. She told me I looked pretty good for an old person. Have you ever been dissed in American Sign Language before? I didn't think so.

I am not complaining. As Mother used to say, "They wouldn't pick on you if they didn't like you."

The truth of the matter is that I am blessed with a great family and with the best friends a man could have. I have no financial worries to speak of, I enjoy robust good health and there is a roof over my head. Like all of us, I have some regrets and there are a few events in my life I wish I could get a "do-over" on. But they are few and I don't dwell on them either.

My goals from here on out are minimal and well defined. I just want to hit 53. I want to outlive my genes. And I want to hit the driver better.

That's all I want. Really.

Grant me this Oh Lord, and I promise to stay out of Your grill for the coming year.