Tuesday, October 03, 2006
That's Our Defense?
Years ago, my little brother John got into a fight in the dorm. It was quite the brawl. He was hauled up in front of the Judicial Board at Hendrix. Hendrix is not the kind of place that is amused by that sort of thing.
He thought that someone in the dorm that he attacked had stolen something from his off-campus apartment. And so he went room-to-room in search of his stuff. And he clocked about 5 guys until cooler heads hauled him off.
I was just back in town from law school. I got the call from Hendrix. In those days Hendrix was the kind of place where the campus minister called you at times like these. I got the call instead of Mother. I also got the call from John.
" What possessed you to start a one man riot?" I asked.
" Hey man," he said. " I was drunk."
" That's our defense?" I asked.
As most of the known political universe knows, Congressman Mark Foley-Republican of Florida, got caught sending sexually explicit IMs to a young boy Congressional page.
Since then his mouthpiece has announced that his client is gay.
That's our defense? I know lots of gay folks. I don't any pedophiles, gay or straight.
His mouthpiece has announced that Foley's an alcoholic.
That's our defense? I don't know any alchies that routinely hit on minors. In fact, and not to make an invidious comparison, I know more gay folks than I know bad alchies. And none of them hit on kids.
His mouthpiece said he was abused as a child by a man of the cloth.
That's our defense? Mouthpiece also refused to name the clergyman or the church. Hello? Mouthpiece's client had better goddamn name whoever it allegedly is.
And get this: " There was absolutely no inappropriate sexual contact with any minor."
That's our defense? Like there's any possible appropriate sexual contact with a kid?
I'm a drunk? I'm gay? I've been abused ( though I won't name who abused me?) I didn't do any inappropriate sexual contact?
That's our defense? That's our defense?