High Dollar Drunks

Here is an amusing article from today's New York Times in which workers in high-class dining establishments in New York recount horror stories about drunk patrons. Most of the stories have to do with women disrobing and guys puking. Oddly enough, no fights are described. I guess wearing a suit imposes a check on some guys.

Now I have seen any of a number of fights, some of which I briefly participated in, in college bars and other far less ritzy joints than the ones set out in the article. And I once saw a couple of statuesque blondes making out in a beer joint in Gulf Shores. The one and only time I had a semi-sexual encounter with a drunk woman under similar circumstances happened in a nice restaurant here in town back when I was in my twenties.

I had gone to the bathroom. As soon as I stepped out, I felt arms going around my neck and someone's tongue going into my mouth. Once I was able to extricate myself, I saw that I was being assaulted by a cute and seriously intoxicated brunette who was struggling to remain upright in high heels. Seems she was put up to it by the other equally toasted women at her table.

I gallantly escorted this walking hangover back to her companions before returning to my date whose gaze encased me in permafrost. Should have stuck with the brunette.

Anyway, hit the link for an amusing piece about life in the fast lane: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/08/01/dining/01drun.html?8dpc

Oh. Remind me to tell you sometime about the night I almost got killed at Fat Harry's in Uptown New Orleans.

I loved school.