Sunday, August 24, 2008

Vox Populi: The Sexually Ambiguous Pharmacist

I did not get to go to Jackson due to an emergency involving a non-profit agency on whose board I serve. That turned out to be a stroke of good luck as my brother John was admitted to the hospital in Jonesboro with a case of pancreatitis which required Amy to leave Clarke here in Little Rock in the tender care of me and my sister-in-law who came down from Conway to spend the last two days at their house.

More about that later. Suffice it to say it has been a crazy 3 days.

John rolled in @ 3:30 this afternoon looking like death warmed over. He asked me to get his prescription for pain meds filled at the pharmacy he uses out in his part of town. I took it in and handed it to the woman behind the counter. I told her that it was for my brother who had been in the hospital the last few days. She found him in the system and told me it would be a few minutes.

After I had gotten some soup and Gatorade for the patient I went back to the pharmacy. After awhile a handsome young man with a shock of blond hair and an incandescent smile called my name. I went up to the counter.

" Are you John?," he asked.

"No. I'm tmfw the famous blogger," I said. " I have traveled west from the People's Republic of Hillcrest and am picking this up for him here in this, the land of land of Range Rovers, bad religion and Republicans, because he has been in the hospital."

"Well," he said, " We will have to have some verification." He affected this stern look on his face.

"What's his date of birth?" he said. He was tapping his jaw with his forefinger.

I drew a blank.

"Hell. I dunno. I've got it down somewhere." I mumbled.

" Let me give you a hint," he stage whispered. "Marrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrch?"

" Look. If I were his wife or his sister I would know. I mean, I know but I just can't remember."

The pharmacist that I handed the scrip to originally came over.

" He's good," she said. " He's the one that handed it to me. His brother's in here all the time."

"Well!" he said. " That settles that."

I signed the forms. I paid the money.

He handed me the little white bag.

" March 9th" he said. " You might want to-I don't know-write it down or something." He was looking up in the sky with a fake thoughty expression.

He smiled. He winked.

I left.

I bet I don't ever forget it again.


Melissa said...

Hope your bother feels better soon.

tmfw said...

Thanks. He is home and resting comfortably.

Anonymous said...

Me, too, on the brother.

"Sexually Ambiguous Pharmicist" is damned funny. Maybe keeping a 7-year-old for a weekend sharpened your sense of humor - not, you understand, that tmfw the famous blogger isn't always quick with the wit.

And why is it that women always remember birthdays and anniversaries while men seldom do? just golf dates, football schedules, and other trivial events??


Polycarp said...

If you'd actually said you were tmfw the famous blogger they never would have given you prescription meds. They don't give them to complete loons.