It Is To Laugh

As of this writing, Barry Bonds will get another chance at tying Babe Ruth's home run record this afternoon at the friendly confines of Wrigley Field in the 3rd game of the Giants' series with the Cubs. So far, the Cubs' pitching has gotten the better of him although for second Tuesday night it looked like a hung curve ball offered up by Rich Hill had number 714 written all over it as it got launched toward centerfield. Unfortunately for Barry, Cubs centerfielder Juan Pierre made a leaping circus catch to keep it in the ballpark.

Maybe he'll get the big one today. I wouldn't bet against it unless Greg Maddox is throwing. These are the Cubs after all.

Baseball people, more so than any other sports fans, love to argue. And so, as Bonds has approached Ruth's record, the discussion about whether to put an asterisk in the record books next to the records put up by the players in the "steroid era" and whether Bonds is a worthy candidate for induction into the Hall of Fame at some time in the future has reached a near crescendo. Herewith, is my two cents worth.

It is amusing to hear the outrage expressed by fans and pundits alike about the home run explosion of the last decade being fueled by anabolic steroids. Like anybody with eyes in their head couldn't see that something was up. Did that keep the fans from packing ballparks in Oakland, Chicago, St. Louis and San Francisco? No. Did the media ask critical questions as outfield bleachers all over the league reenacted the siege of Vicksburg every night for about 5 seasons? For the most part, no. Did Major League Baseball and the Players' Union turn blind eyes to what was otherwise plain as day? Absolutely. The so-called steroid scandal represents an era of ostrich-like behavior on the part of the entire baseball community. Like many wronged lovers, we suspected there was cheating in the relationship. But we really didn't want to know. Not really.

Secondly, the suggestion that this malfeasance on the part of our erstwhile musclebound heroes merits the placing of asterisks by their records implies that the records of the game are somehow sancrosanct. It is to laugh. Baseball has been cooking the books practically since Doubleday.

Are you going to put asterisks by the pitchers who threw in the "dead ball" or in the "high mound" eras? Are you going to put asterisks by the hitters who hit in the "rabbit ball" era? Are you gonna put an asterisk by the names of the old timers, like Ruth, who were only likely to face one pitcher per game?

Is it the fact that Bonds did performance enhancing drugs that torques you so? Well, you might as well wipe out Pete Rose's hit streak because he was on amphetamines (along with everybody else in baseball) the whole damn time. The recently departed Steve Howe won a Cy Young. He did that once. However he was a virtual "Murderer's Row" when it came to flunking drug tests which he did repeatedly. I don't know if booze and acid can be said to be performance enhancing substances exactly. But Mickey Mantle played hung over on occasion and Dock Ellis once threw a no-hitter while tripping for Chrissakes.

You could look it up.

So if you are going to put an asterisk by the name of Barry Bonds, you better put one next to a whole bunch of other guys. Because baseball's records are fishier than hell.

Does Bonds belong in the Hall of Fame? I don't see why not. People who argue that Bonds does not belong in Cooperstown need to remember two things. First, he put up the bulk of his numbers long before he hooked up with Victor Conte. As my brother put it, "[T]he fact of the matter is that in the last fifteen years if you leave the ball in the middle of the plate, Bonds will lose it for you." That much is indisputable. Secondly, the use of steroids in baseball was not illegal until last Spring. How can you penalize a guy for using something that was not illegal by the rules of baseball at the time? Sure, it was a felony and maybe that should count for something. But let us remind ourselves that nobody in MLB was motivated in the slightest to do the first damn thing about it so long as the cash registers were jingling.

If Bonds doesn't get in the HOF it will because the baseball writers, who do the voting, almost to a man despise him. And certainly Bonds has done himself no favors in this regard by disporting himself like a churlish jerk virtually his whole career. As if that weren't a sufficient feather in his cap, rumor has it that he is the target of a Grand Jury investigation in San Francisco. It will win him no votes from the writers if he has a few felonies "writ large against his name."

Talk about your asterisks.

Baseball has been played by a bunch of drunks, sociopaths, and dumbasses since the mind of man runneth not to the contrary. It has been run by greedheads who in the immortal words of Bill Conlin "would go outside with forks if it were raining soup."

Baseball and Barry Bonds deserve each other. With no asterisks.