Random Thoughts

The following are some random thoughts that have come to me while getting over a stomach bug, proving once again that an idle mind is the devil's workshop:

TERRELL OWENS- It is indeed hard for the average person to pony up the first ounce of pity for the plight of the professional athlete in a team sport who demands that his contract be renegotiated. It is particularly difficult when the athlete in question is as narcissistic and has as few roots in reality as Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Terrell Owens, who was quoted last week in the Miami Herald as saying:

" At the end of the day, I don't have to worry about what people think of me, whether they hate me or not. People hated on Jesus. They threw stones at him and tried to kill him, so can I complain or worry about what people think?"

I am no scholar, but try as I might, I don't recall a biblical account of the stoning of Jesus. And the historical record is clear in that the Romans did actually succeed in killing Jesus, albeit only temporarily, depending on your religious persuasion. But let us forget for the moment our inability to comprehend someone being unhappy with a contract that pays him 49 million dollars over 7 years. And let us try to overlook the hubris of a man who, intentionally or not, equates his business dispute with the agony of Christ.

The fact is, Owens has every right to take this action and to hold out of training camp if he feels so led. People often confuse business relations with moral obligations. And while there is certainly a moral element to the concept of living up to one's agreements, of equal dignity is the concept that implicit in every contract is the right to breach. This is Contracts 101.

Unlike Major League Baseball, the NFL has revenue sharing. This ensures that every team is awash with money from television and radio as well as from merchandising. This means that every NFL team is turning a healthy profit no matter how incompetently it is run ( read Phoenix Cardinals). Secondly, unlike the NBA, the NFL's owners are not madmen. Accordingly, there are no guaranteed contracts in the NFL. Or there are none that I know of. This means that teams can get rid of guys who underperform or get dinged up without having to eat their salary in perpetuity (read New York Knicks and Portland Trailblazers).

Both Owens and his agent, the equally reptilian Drew Rosenhaus know that he is an injury away from getting cut. And so, they are threatening to breach by "holding out." The Eagles, for their part, are threatening to sue to get the signing bonus back. These are all big boys here. And it says here at TMFW that Owens will go back as they are taking quite the PR hit. I mean, Rosenhaus is so obnoxious that he managed to save a little boy from drowning last week and still come across as a jerk.

Owens has every right to do what he is doing, even if you and I cannot comprehend it. I am not one to invoke pop theology, but since TO has brought it up: What would Jesus do?

I have no idea. But I would like to think that He would have a greater sense of perspective and that He would comport Himself with a lot more dignity than Owen and Rosenhaus have displayed thus far.

PROFESSIONAL TENNIS IS SUCH BULLSHIT- The US Open, will crank up here in about a month. I don't know if you have seen it yet, but the USTA has given nicknames to some of the players in its advertising. Really. Roger Federer is called "The Boss." Justine Henin-Hardenne they refer to as "The Comeback Kid." Andy Roddick is "The Rocket" and Venus Williams is "The Goddess." You can see for yourself at http://usopenseries/news/fullstory.sps?inewsid=194928 .

Why would the USTA adopt the subtle elegance of Pro Wrestling to hype its product?

Because nobody watches tennis anymore. At least not the men. The women are more interesting. They are , for the most part, easy on the eyes. Which I know should be an irrelevant consideration, but hey, I'm a guy. And the women all hate each other. This adds an aura of bitchiness that you just don't get with the guys.

Besides, the men are just boring. They, for the most part, rarely stray too far from the baseline. Assuming that the point gets past the first serve that is. The only serve and volleyers left are Great Britain's Tim Henman and USA's Taylor Dent whose main claim to fame is getting his ass kicked by Andre's 4 year old in that commercial. The rest of them approach the net as if it is radioactive. Where's the excitement in that?

I mean, I will watch the US Open because I used to be a player and I know how hard it is to play tennis at a certain level. That, and I know for a fact that Roger Federer may be the best player ever even if he is allergic to play at the net. And so, I will watch.

But there is no reason to make a BFD out of changing the color of the courts from green to blue. There's no reason to give the players these stupid nicknames (and by the way, there is only one Rocket and his last name is Laver) and there is no reason in this day and age why the women don't play 3 out of 5 just like the men.

No reason other than the fact that tennis is just bullshit. And that nobody much watches anymore.

HOCKEY IS BACK!-Who cares?

BERNARD HOPKINS-Just shut the hell up. What is it about you guys from Philly anyway?

And this are my random thoughts delivered while my stomach sounds for all the world like a flooded out Evinrude.